I have a dream...

I have a dream that one day this thing we call parenting will become easier....

The original title to this post was just simply "I suck", but then after talking with some amazing parents and good friends, I decided, I don't suck. Parenting sucks.
Stay with me and don't call CPS just yet.
Let me first say I love my children. They are even more worth it than everyone said they would be. BUT parenting is hard. Everything about it is hard and most the time I feel pretty insufficient in doing it. From eating, to schedule keeping, and discipline there are a million different ways to view each and every decision I make as a parent. And once I find a style I feel comfortable with, or works for me, something throws a big ole wrench into the plan, like teething.

It's been a trying week at the Asbell house. Luke is cutting his two lower molars. The top two decided to make their appearance over Christmas. I can't imagine how terrible cutting two very large teeth can feel, but his overall demeanor is giving me a clue. Even with him being in pain, he still has managed to pick up two very cute new tricks.
He has found everyone's nose. When you ask him "Where is my nose" he reaches out and squeezes your nose. Now the first time he did this, it was my nose, so I (as any good parent would) promptly honked at him. This delighted him to no end and he squeezed harder and then clapped at his cleverness. And as Pavlov's dogs would do, we immediately start cheering "YAY LUKE" when he clapped for himself.

Evan and I usually operate at one volume; loud. While E, Luke and I were playing on the chair Luke promptly sits up looks at both Evan and I, puts on finger on his mouth and says "shhhhh". I got shushed by my youngest son. Of course we died laughing which made him do it again and again. But instead of it coming out "shh" it comes out as just an 's'. So it is 'sh' with a lisp.

Evan had a big weekend. He filled a "Responsibility Chart". I got this idea from a friend who I share a lot of my parenting struggles with. I am so glad she passed on this little pearl of wisdom. I made a chart for Evan back in the Spring of last year that had items like "I was a good listener",  "Sweet to my brother" (we wanted him to have one that he could always achieve), and "Stayed in my bed". They worked as long as mommy and daddy remembered to add the stars. Sadly we got lazy with his chart because the main thing we wanted him to do was stay in bed all night, and he wasn't succeeding. Starting the first night of Christmas break, Evan slept through the night without getting up. Since he had not done this for five months, we jumped on this opportunity. I made a new star chart and every morning he slept through the night without waking us up, we gave him a star. Exciting news, he has filled up THREE charts since the first night of Christmas break. We decided to have him earn a special reward rather than a toy like the first time we tried the chart. After filling his first chart, he and John went to the movies. The second chart earned a playdate with Gran. For the third chart he requested he bake cookies with me. You have no idea how this warmed my heart. We baked three times over the break, so I guess he was missing it. This came at a very opportune time because a great friend had just given me an entire set of Williams Sonoma alphabet cookie cutters that included a new sugar cookie recipe. 

So I have decided that parenting is never going to get easier. I think each stage and each new age will present its own problems. I can only pray for the wisdom to handle what challenge is in front of me today. Tomorrow can worry about itself. And really, if it was easy, I probably wouldn't be doing it right. In the end we can get through most things like a cranky teething child or super busy schedule because everyone in my family is healthy.