Saturday, February 29, 2020

God's Timing



God's timing is pretty amazing...and something I struggle with. A very wise friend told me recently, "There are people who want to know the end of the book when they start the first page." **slowly raises my hand**

Today is special to me because it is the day my dad passed away. Notice I didn't say sad. It was sad for me...for years. And over time it never got easier. Never once. It just became my normal. My normal to not be able to call him or see him. My normal to do a double-take when I saw someone who looked like him, which happened way more often than I ever imagined it would those first 8 years. My normal to laugh and think "Oh I can't wait to tell Daddy this" to only remember, I will have to wait to tell him that. My normal to miss him with every. single. day.

But over time what I did gain was a tiny bit of wisdom. See, Daddy passed away on a leap year. I got a call at school on Valentine's Day 2004 that mom had him rushed to the hospital for being unresponsive after dealing with incurable lung cancer for less than a year. When I got there, my neighbor, who was a nurse, told me his blood pressure was in the single digits. He should have been dead....but he wasn't.

He hung on for 2 more weeks. We all said our goodbyes multiple times in multiple ways. He didn't speak those two weeks except for once. He told us that was going home, but not that day. He needed to wait until tomorrow. I joke that apparently, heaven had reached its quota that day. Daddy hung on for 2 more days before he passed on February 29, 2004....Leap Day.

Then I did not see God's timing. My sister had literally JUST returned home to her family and had to fly back out. My mom had JUST retired early in the school year to take care of him. My class was going on a field trip that I had organized the morning he passed. But those were all things that could be managed. The timing that I didn't understand was even though I said goodbye, I wasn't ready to let go.

However....this day only comes around once every four years. Daddy and God were pretty strategic I believe. Gifting me four years between it happening and observing the 'anniversary' of it gave me time. The gift of time to go from only remembering the hellacious year of cancer to being able to remember what his laugh sounded like. It is a gift to fade away from the chemo, weight loss, and sickness and bring back his smile, his love of cars, his passion for 'sho nuff country' and westerns to my memories. But it doesn't get easier. It won't ever be easy.

But at least now I can smile when I think about him. God's timing is everything.

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2012 post about Daddy - You are always on my mind
2016 post about Daddy - God gave you me!


Thursday, January 2, 2020

Goodbye 2019; Hello 2020!


What a great year!

There were first concerts for each boy,
Evan's last talent show,
Lots of traveling! Houston, the beach, California!
Our first broken bone,
The end of elementary school,
POPPY!!
And the Christmas FLU


Goodbye, 2019! We had a great time. Looking forward to the next DECADE of fun!

Alcatraz

We spent our last day exploring the city and visiting Alcatraz. Luckily, Missy got tickets back in November!

We went exploring on Pier 39 for a little bit before heading over to the island. This selfie makes me chuckle so hard! Ian, Missy, and Evan are the only ones who head the countdown apparently. Y'all...I am still laughing.

We were able to see all the shops, take in the views and visit in the sea lions! They were fun. 


Soon it was time to board the ferry and make our way over to Alcatraz!

The ferry gave us some more extraordinary views!



Inside was fascinating. We did the audio walking tour. The history of the prison is rich.







Fun fact - they kept the shower water as warm as they could so if the prisoners tried to escape, the water in the bay would be too cold to stand. Also, there was no privacy...

and don't think for an instant I didn't threaten to leave them there....


The island also provided some terrific views. One part of the tour talked about how prisoners could sometimes hear the New Years Eve parties floating over the bay.



It was a great tour and I highly recommend it to anyone who goes to San Francisco!

We ended our day walking to Ghiradelli Square. While the lines were super long and we didn't get to enjoy any chocolate, we did find yet another brewery to refuel for our walk back.




20,000 steps later we were ready to head back home! What a last day!!

Exploratorium

We visited the cousins' favorite museum, Exploratorium, on day three. We knew we were going to drive into the city for Alcatraz but decided to brave the trip two days in a row for this amazing museum. There was no shortage of exhibits or people. It's a popular place, especially on a rainy day!


This museum requires you to be hands-on! You won't find a 'Please don't touch" sign anywhere! Especially at the toilet water fountain. Two water fountains....both porcelain...one is shaped like a toilet (which is obviously unused!) Which one do you choose? Well, you can see what my family chose.



Freeze frame water droplets or photobomb opportunity? 


No filter needed here! This monochromatic room hides all the colors. You have to shine a flashlight to reveal all them. 


Who says video games aren't social? Can they work together to win these games?


This was Imogen's favorite exhibit. This was my least favorite exhibit. Dead decomposing mice...ewww.

So many mirrors!

Evan found a drum set.

Is it hot or is it cold?? We can't tell!

There was art too! 


What does it take to power these electric items? A lot of pedaling!


Air is a pretty powerful thing.

Can color affect your mood? Put this giant glowing ball on your head and find out!

It was a terrific but exhausting day!