Elder and Wiser

Well, maybe not wiser, but he’s elder, now. J

John was sworn in as elder at Hope Presbyterian. I am so proud of him for many reasons. John serves our church in the band every Sunday night at The Stirring. On top of being away from work between 50-55 hours a week, he finds time to practice almost daily the songs for the weekend. He also gives close to 5 hours on Sunday to rehearse and play. He is also a part of The Stirring Leadership Team which prays for those who attend Hope and meet once a month to plan services. Even on top of this, he has found a different way to step up and serve Hope some more.

We did a spiritual gift survey years ago. John’s top gift with no margin of competition was leadership. He is a quiet leader though. He speaks when he needs to and always thinks before speaking. He doesn’t talk much, but when he does, people listen. Unlike me, who doesn’t stop talking.

The elder commitment is three years. I am excited to see how this journey will deepen his spiritual walk and strengthen his love for our church even more.

John – I am proud of you and for the next three years, will call you my elder (even though you are younger!)

May the force be with you

This was a big weekend at our house. Evan watched Star Wars for the first time. Now let me back up. Let me back waaaaaaay up.

John is a Star Wars fan. Not like, “I’m going to dress as a Storm Trooper for the midnight showing” fan. Just a “I am going to go to a midnight showing” fan. He likes the movies, he just isn’t crazy. Now as the girlfriend of a fan, I needed to be up on my Star Wars lingo. I could name the characters. I knew Yoda was the little green one and Luke and Leia were brother and sister. But I had to admit to him at one point, I had never seen the movies. So being the good girlfriend I was, I sat down and watched the movies. I think it was a prerequisite for getting my rock.

I even went to see episode 1-3 (see…I know my stuff) in the theatre with him. I am not saying I totally get it, but I ‘ve seen them all. Aliens, good guys, bad guys, a little incest, lightsabers…got it.

Fast forward to after we get married. We talked about kids quite a bit those first five years. Places we would take them, how we would raise them, all those parenting things we saw other people do that we just KNEW we wouldn’t. At some point, Star Wars came up. Imagine that. I adamantly said I didn’t want my kids watching it until 2^nd grade. I taught second grade at the time and thought that age was the most appropriate to understand fantasy vs. reality. John was thinking younger. We contemplated knowing it didn’t really matter at that point, but enjoying the friendly banter back and forth.

Then we had kids…one who’s name is Luke….

A book in the Bible…A Star Wars character = win win for the Asbells.

Side bar: Someone played a practical joke on a teacher in Luke’s infant class and had her convinced Luke’s middle name was Skywalker. It’s not. It’s Charles.

So we began this discussion long before kids, but had no reality associated with it. Then we had kids and those kids got older.  Evan has gotten Star Wars toys since he was little. He has learned the characters names. He knows what color light saber each has. (Wait, you mean it just doesn’t go with their outfits? Like shoes or a purse?) He knows which ship they drive. (There are different ships?) John thought it time Evan was taught how all of the toys and information he had gathered all played out. Enter, the movie.

A little over a year ago we had to discussion again. I decided to take it to my lovely and quite intelligent Facebook friends. Funny enough, most of the guys went young with their desire age of exposure and most of the females went older. And some of the responses were truly hilarious!

 

 

I knew John would watch it with him. I knew Evan would tell us if he got scared. I knew Evan understood the difference in realty and fantasy. I knew this would make my little boy’s year.

One week this summer we had Evan all to ourselves and I buckled. I told John that we could watch Star Wars with Evan. There was also a movie in the theatre he wanted to see, so we gave him a choice. Much to our surprise, Evan wanted to go to the theatre. We don’t get to the movie theatre very often, so it really is a special treat to go see a movie in the theatre. John was disappointed, but kept his disappointment in check even if I found him walking about the house, scratching his head, muttering “I mean what little boy doesn’t want to watch Star Wars…is he even my kid….hmmmm”.

Additional Side Bar – there is no doubt Evan is John’s kid. Please do not start any rumors.

Evan continued to get books and toys and games all referencing Star Wars. Brother was even into it by now.  I am not sure how it came up again, but it did. I am embarrassed to even write this part. We are talking about it and I asked,

A: “Well which one would he watch?”

J: “Star Wars.”

A: “Yeah, I got that, but which one.”

J: “Star Wars.”

A; “WHICH Star Wars.”

J: “I don’t know what you mean. The one called Star Wars.”

A:….blank stare….

J: “Amanda, the first one, episode four, is called Star Wars.”

A: “Are the rest of them called something else?”

J: …..blank stare….head shake…exit room

Last Saturday afternoon, I was nursing a pretty bad headache and we decided to keep things pretty low key. John gave me one look, raised his eyebrows and grinned. Again, I had a headache and knew I would give into to whatever he was about to suggest.

“We could see if Evan wants to watch Star Wars…”

“But what would we do with Luke?”

“He can watch Planes in our bedroom.”

Which in my mind translated to, you can lay in bed with Luke while he is entertained by a screen for an hour and a half and don’t have to sit through Star Wars. WINNING!!!

Evan was stoked, did a victory dance, and counted down the minutes.

During the first 15 minutes Evan has about 20 questions. Who’s that guy? Where are they? Is he a good guy? Why does he look like that? Is he an alien? If you have been around Evan for more than half an hour, you know this is true. Finally John said, “Evan, just watch the movie.”

The last 20 minutes, Luke and I joined him. Luke wasn’t too interested in it, thank heavens, but enjoyed sitting on the couch with his guys.

 

So there it is. I let my 5.75 year old child watch Star Wars. First thing he said Sunday morning? “Daddy, can we watch Star Wars again?”

Jesus, Yoga, and the Internet

It took a while. I wasn't sure I was going to be able to do it. I got upset, frustrated, even thought about giving up. But that just wouldn't be me. Good news for the universe, I finally figured about my New Year's Resolutions for 2014!!

I am kind of a New Year's Resolution person. I make them every year. It's actually how this blog got started. I know there are New Year's Resolution nay-sayers out there. "Why wait until January to make yourself a better person? New Year's Resolutions are made to be broken!" etc etc etc.

If I was the type of person who made flippant resolutions, I would agree with all this. But most years I I start thinking of my resolutions months before the new year and here is why. I am trying to constantly better myself. I don't need a resolution for that. My New Year's Resolutions don't tend to make me a 'better' person, but a happier person. I have noticed a theme in my New Year's Resolutions. They are all about me. I know, I know...that makes me seems self centered, BUT, when I made a New Year's Resolution that involved someone else reaping the benefits, I didn't keep it. These resolutions have to be about what I need in my life, and I would argue that when I am a happier person, I tend to be a 'better' person.

For example, I made a resolution last year that I really didn't want to keep. I thought I needed to keep it to be a better person, but I didn't want to do it. It didn't bring me joy. I didn't look forward to it. It was an obligation; just one more thing I had to do in my already exhaustingly busy week. You all are smart people (or you wouldn't be my friends...) and can figure out, I didn't keep that resolution. I tried it once a week for about a month and then let it slide.

But there was one resolution I did keep last year and guess what - it was something I WANTED to do! It made me happy. I looked forward to it. I mentioned in my blog last year I was working on relationships. Before kids John and I would have people over to the house constantly. I loved opening our home to our friends. Well, after kids it just became more difficult, as things tend to do after kids. But now that our kids are a little older and we have made friends with people who have kids our age, I wanted to get back into the habit of inviting people over. Entertaining sounds so fancy and we are not fancy people. I like to call it 'get togethers'. So one of my resolutions last year was to invite people over at least once a month. Sometimes I would cook, sometimes it was potluck, and sometimes it was just pizza, but at least once a month our house was full of friends and loved ones. It's great to get back into a habit that I once loved.

That New Year's resolution was for me. I wanted to have friends over. I wanted my kids to grow up with friends and family in the house all the time. I wanted adult conversation in my weekend!! So I kept it. I loved keeping it. I looked forward to my 'have people over' time each month and so did my kids. Funny story - I was picking up some toys last night and Evan said, "Who is coming over?". Not sure if that's a sign he is used to people coming over or me just cleaning our house when people are coming over. ha!

When I finally figured out that my resolutions needed to make me a happy person, not so much a 'better' person, they came to be very quickly.

1. Jesus - As you know John and I are deeply involved in our church, The Stirring at Hope Presbyterian. John is an elder and plays in The Stirring Band and I am on the leadership team and play the important second role of Chermanda when needed for announcements. Jesus is my guru, my homeboy, my BFF and I need to get into His Word in the worst kind of way.

The Stirring Leadership Team Christmas 2013 - minus a few critical people!

 

Jesus and I talk ALL.DAY.LONG. But usually that involves a lot of talking from me and a lot of listening from Him. When I realized this pattern wasn't the healthiest, I decided I need to dive into His word to open my ears a little wider and close my mouth a little tighter. This year I want to spend at least once a week in a true study of God's Word. This may be me and the bible. This might be me an a devotional. I am still researching what would make this the most beneficial for our relationship. (I would LOVE any suggestions on devotionals in the comments section! I do best with a journalling type study.)

2. Yoga - If you follow this blog at all, you might remember I have gotten into yoga in the past six months. So much so that I even created a yoga instagram account.

I have gotten some flack, but a lot of support, about this account. Yes, it's open, not private. Yes, anyone in the world can see my yoga pictures. Yes, there have been a couple of nasty comments that I immediately delete. But I have a good reason to keep it open. The yoga community on instagram is huge. Like...huge. I have learned so much from these yogis and been able to gain so much inspiration and encouragement from these strangers that I feel it has been one of the major reasons my practice has grown as much as it has. So in 2014, I would like to keep my yoga instagram account active which means participating in challenges (I am shooting for one a month), posting progression shots and even diving into posting video of different flows. I am super excited to see where my practice is in December!!

3. The Interwebz - I did really good that first year of blogging, but then I slacked on the good ole Goldfish for Dinner last year. I only wrote 45 posts and 11 of them were in the last month. This is my kids' baby book. These are my family memories, my favorite pictures, my favorite stories, the funny things that my kids say and do. I can't trust my brain to keep all of this information. I find myself thumbing through my book I published last year all the time. I just ordered by 2013 book! I want...no need this blog to document all the amazing things that go on around me day in and day out so when these boys are frustrating teenagers, I can look back and remember how hard I thought I had it. ;) My goal, once again, is to write 52 posts this year. Average of one a week.

So welcome 2014!! I am excited your here and can't wait to see what you have in store for the Asbells!

Bring on 2014!!

I think this was one of the first years I wasn't mourning my past on NYE. There is a tiny part in this extrovert's body who wants a huge celebration on New Year's Eve. I want to be in a crowd of people dressed up in fancy NYE clothes (not NYC crowd, but a large group) shouting the countdown, dancing to bad music and laughing with complete strangers. To my husband this sounds like a complete nightmare. His worst dream. If I plan on torturing him, I would ask him do this.

After kids, it wasn't so much the getting a babysitter that was hard, it was the going to bed at 1am or later and getting up at 6am with a headache. Or, if I am honest, actually making it to midnight. And most years I have to be back at work on the 2nd. It was just a recipe for a bad couple days. Even though I knew this was just a short phase in my kids life, each NYE I would be a tiny bit sad I wasn't at some big shin dig, dressed up, counting down to midnight. Just a tiny bit....that 6am wake up made me feel smart for my decision.

So this year I decided to have a 9pm countdown. I knew my kids could stay up for that and my eldest loves a good party. We invited the Californians and the Lawsons over for a cookie decorating, balloon dropping, noise maker having New Year's Eve party.

My boys love a good cookie decorating party!

 

I have no idea why I am the only one at the table laughing...

Gemma the Cookie Monster!!!

Then came the 9pm (...it might have been 8:45...) balloon drop. Hey - the kids had no clue and still had fun! I had a plan. I worked on this plan for a while. I cut garbage bags. Missy, Angela and I (more them than me) blew up balloons. I rigged a drop system. I recruited Terry and Ian to help me hang it. I planned, I schemed....for a big fat fail. There was no way I could keep the weight of the balloons on the fan, I was running out of time...blah blah blah. So I ripped the contraption off the fan (still laughing at myself) so I could just take them upstairs. Well, John was upstairs doing something with the kids. As I pulled, off came the varnish to part of our cherry wood fan. riiiiiippppp. Ian, Terry and I start investigating the damage.  I hear John coming down the stairs so I hiss, "turn on the fan!!" Someone hits the fan switch and I skip over delightfully to John and give him a big hug and kiss...ya know...to distract him. He's a guy, come on, it's not that difficult. I did a great job, but John looks up and sees Ian and Terry just staring at him. He looks at me, back at them, then at me and says, "What? What is going on?" I said, "nothing!" and mentioned whiskey and we were good again. I wasn't be deceitful...I just wanted to wait until after the party. If I would have told him right then he would have obsessed about it all night, mumbling under his breath how to fix it, staring at the fan, not having fun. So I made the thoughtful, kind decision to spare him that stress and let him have fun!! Aren't I a great wife???

Imogen was our official balloon dropper. The rest of the kids were more than excited to have the balloons drop (or float softly down) on their head. 

I love how blurry, chaotic, loud these picture look! It was totally the feel at that moment.

Then the other kids wanted to get in on the drop! Imogen did a great job playing the part of 'girl who gets balloons dropped on her'. 

PARTY ANIMALS!
 

Happy New Years everyone!!! I can't wait to see what this year holds for my family! God has big plans for us and I hope I can step up to meet fulfill them.
I hope 2014 brings you all happiness and contentment!!!

4th and Final Christmas!

The Californians are in town!!!

Christmas 2013

What a difference two years makes!!

Christmas 2011

Every two years my sister and her family come in town for Christmas! So fun! The cousins are now all at an age they can play together. We opened presents the first morning they were here. Again, the boys take totally different philosophies when opening presents.

 

 

I only get to see this side of my family once every two years. Thank God for technology though! We are able to keep in contact via email, text, Twitter, FaceTime, etc, but it is still hard. I try not to think about how much I miss them throughout the year but celebrate the fact that I have such an amazing family.

Christmas 2011

Christmas 2013