Writing Checks

Remember when people wrote checks to pay for things? Before debit cards? Before automatic or online payments? There are still a couple things we write checks for...but man, is it a pain now. I do remember it taking me months to remember to write the new year. Something the boys will probably never experience.

Either way - it's a brand new year. We are literally 9 hours into the New Year (I started this at 9am) and I don't have my New Year's Resolutions decided yet. For those who don't know me, this is really out of character. I am a New Year's Resolution person. It's actually how this blog got started.  I usually have my NY's resolutions decided in October or November. I take them very seriously!

But here it is January 1st and I don't have one resolution. I think I know why, but can't pinpoint it, and since I am a verbal processor, I am going to write about it.

2014 taught me quite a bit. There were some things I did terribly wrong and some things I completely rocked. Often my New Year's Resolutions stem from the past year and seeing what I need to improve upon or keep going. As I look back on 2014, I am seeing a trend.

Balance.

Remember writing those checks? It took me a while to learn how to balance my checkbook. I was the worst at it. I bounced several checks in college. I remember crying hysterically when I bounced the checks. Money wasn't something that just appeared in my account. I had to work for every cent I spent. My parents had to work for every cent they gave me. I was always so disappointed in myself when I was too lazy to balance the checkbook or proud or embarrassed not to buy/spend money/go out. But in the end the consequence to that action was always worse. I hate feeling like I disappointed my parents or put any financial strain on them. I hated getting charged $35 when I didn't have enough in my account to cash that $5.00.

So what has 2014 taught me? Balance. Just like that check book in college, except this time I have learned my lessons about keeping it balanced.

I will believe NO is not a bad word in 2015. We can't do everything. We can't go to every birthday party. We can't do every sport. God's plan for me does not include exhaustion. I am going to commit to keeping my family well balanced with school, outside activities that make them HAPPY, and quality family time. I learned this lesson with Luke and soccer this year. I thought Luke needed to be a part of an organized sport. If I am going to be truly honest, I know that sports are a big thing with his peer group. They are with Evan's as well. I didn't want Luke to 'get behind'. Well, this is Luke we are talking about. I can tell you, we weren't ready for organized sports, at least in that kind of setting and he wasn't shy in letting me know that.
Evan also taught me this in 2014. He loves to drum. This is his true passion right now. That and baseball. Every time a new sport season comes up, I ask him if he wants to play. If it's not baseball season, he says, "I just want to play the drums." I might have tried to convince him to play a couple of different sports even after he said no just because I thought he 'should'. I didn't listen to what he really wanted. Looking back, if he actually played those sports, we would have had ZERO balance in our life.

 

I will cherish our family time in 2015. The boys are terrific friends. As soon as one of them wakes up, they immediately go find the other one. If Evan isn't home, the first thing Luke wants to know is where he is and when he's coming back. When Luke naps in the afternoon, Evan almost crawls out of his skin. He watches the clock like a hawk and wants to wake him up as soon as it turns 3pm.  Luke may not show it as well as Evan, but both boys have mad brother love for each other. I want to foster this friendship among them and I think it starts with balanced family time. Time at home as a family doing family things like playing board games, wrestling on the bed, reading stories, going to the park, playing in the backyard. If we overcommit ourselves, we don't get enough of that. These guys are going to be teenagers soon and I going to wish they were always under my feet or hanging on me. I need to cherish this time I have with them now.

 

Speaking of family - I need to recognize a proper balance between who we are as individuals (and a collective unit) and my expectations for us in 2015. We are flawed. We aren't perfect BUT we are exactly who God made us to be. I am not a pinterest mom. My boys don't need a Pinterest mom. They need mom who will be there for them when their heart gets broken or their knee is scraped. My Luke isn't going enjoy talking to strangers. Here's the great thing.  The world also needs more introverts like Luke who like having a close inner circle, who may not always be the first to talk. My Evan isn't going to want alone time.  The world needs more Evans who put themselves second (or last). Whose hearts are bigger than their body. So my prayer is for God to show me exactly how to foster that in each of them and myself AND love the fact we were made for a very specific reason.

It may be more general than years past, but I feel this year's resolution will have more meaning than mosts. Happy New Year my friends! I pray 2015 is one filled with love and happiness!